My Kid Is Better Than Your Kid

I don’t know how it’s possible, but Binky visits the house directly after dying. 😛

And Sodium comes to escort Binky to the afterlife, or something like that.

Vanadium: Okay, maybe Great-Grampa died the night before so no one was in the mood to say good-bye or anything, but at least I have the attention of the legacy readers. I just wanna say

Phosphorus: Hey, I just finished a book, completed my LTW, and got a moodlet manager!

Moodlet manager! I missed you so!

Argon: Hey, Vanny! Just called to let you know that I learned to talk without moving my lips!

Argon: With your fancy private school stuff, you’re definitely a shoo-in for heiress.

Argon: Just take any pills the school psychologist gives you, and be good.

I think it’s psychiatrists that can prescribe drugs.

Argon: Scratch that. Don’t take drugs. Now excuse me while I make you a little brother.

Argon: Billy! Love of my life!

Titanium: I don’t approve!

Argon: No one does, dear.

Titanium: But this is different. I just witnessed a romantic betrayal!

I have no idea why. My only guess is that Billy is now dating someone else?

Adorable bedtime story time!

Merlot: But don’t you think you should be in your own bed and not Vanadium’s?

Scandium: Vanadium who?

Wow, Scandium. Way to totally steal your cousin’s bed the moment she’s gone.


This is completely inappropriate.

Argon: Ooh, I heard a lullaby.

Argon: So, now that I’m preggo… please leave.

Billy: Doesn’t matter, had woohoo.

Suddenly, Argon autonomously decides to ‘express sympathy for Potassium’ which, first of all, doesn’t really look like sympathy. Second of all, I can’t find anything wrong with Kay. I guess it might have something to do with the romantic betrayal thing, but Kay doesn’t have romantic interests with Billy or anything.

Vanadium: I’m back because the other kids were teasin’ me.

No new skills and no new traits.

Vanadium: Since I’m gonna be a reporter, I’m writing a stunning exposé on the boarding school, entitled Smugglesworth Prep: Haven or Hell? and I’m going to end bullyin’. And make tons of money.

Argon: BLERGH.

Yay babies!

Argon: How DARE you get bad grades! Just like my sister to raise brats who can’t keep their grades up! Time out!

Titanium: I can’t even find a real corner to stand in! 😦

Vanadium: Mama, I’m back ’cause the kids were being real mean to me. I didn’t learn anything, but this did launch my career as an investigative reporter so it’s not all bad. Read me a bedtime story?

Vanadium: Great-grampa says we’re not supposed to read the books Grandma writes.

Argon: I’m your mother, and I know what’s best for you.

Vanadium: You said that about the boarding school, and I just got picked on.

Argon: Sh… only dreams now.


Quick change of clothes in bed.

Argon: So, mom. Your birthday is coming up tomorrow. Going to be an elder, huh?

Phosphorus: You mention my birthday and you WILL be going to the hospital, and not for work. And I will hurt you so badly that none of your coworkers will recognize you. This I swear.

Argon: Oh, look. It’s the star athlete.

Kay: Oh, look. It’s the murderer… why is this the first time I’m appearing?

I’ll spend the next chapter focusing on you and your kids. This I swear.

Argon: BABY.

Vanadium: You know, Titanium, it’s not illegal for cousins to get married, and then we could BOTH be heirs without all this silly fightin’ over whose kid will be the next heir, like Mama and Aunt Kay are doing.

Vanadium: And then…

Oh GOD THE GARDENING. I thought I escaped it, but then I realized you can NEVER escape the gardening references. They will find you.


My response exactly.

But anyway, I just checked online, and I don’t think cousins can get married without a mod? So I don’t think that’s going to happen. Thank FSM.


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