Last time, Lithium got herself a boyfriend just in time to be shipped off to boarding school.
Theodore waits diligently for Lithium to return, because if she finds he did anything else while she was away, things might get ugly. While Lithium’s too old to play with Jamar now, she still follows his/her/its teachings.
Theodore: My breath must be minty fresh for my beloved!
Ellie: I think it’s time you go home.
While Ellie is distracted by Theo, Helium sneaks off to the school and floods the building.
Helium: I’ll bet everyone wishes they voted for me now! I’m edgy.
He’s still hurting about his one vote.
Helium: Love me?
Speaking of pranks, Zhan gets caught by the ‘scary computer’ prank, which Hydrogen set up when he snuck out of the house after prom but I didn’t get a picture.
Iliana: Were you screaming in here?
Zhan: No, ma’am. That must have been someone else. I’m a police officer, so I would never scream in a library.
Iliana: That’s very impressive. Now you’re a celebrity.
Zhan questions Iliana, now that she’s not to stuck up to talk to him.
I’m pretty sure reporters and the like don’t have to be famous to ask a celebrity some questions, though.
DAMMIT, ELLIE. GO TO WORK.
Ellie: *stands there*
If she doesn’t reach her LTW, it’s because of the times when she just stands there while the carpool is outside.
Woman: Oh, my poor husband! Maybe I’ll get the Oh My Ghost! opportunity if I stand outside of the science facility.
Ellie comes out of work, and I realize that I haven’t gotten a single pop-up about Lithium in boarding school, and I miss her. Since we are gaining nothing but losing Lithium’s wonderful perfect heavenly face, Ellie calls Lithium home.
Lithium: If I stayed there one more second, I was going to kill myself and Helium would have to be the heir.
She was there for two days.
Lithium: Worst two days of my life.
But I just couldn’t keep Lithium away for so long. Just look at her! *sighs*
*melts into puddle*
Lithium: That’s so pathetic, but if it got me back home, I’m happy.
But Lithium isn’t home for long because Invisible!Zhan is sending her to military school.
Just kidding: they’re going to China.
As soon as they arrive, I find this:
Remember the girlfriend Zhan had before he married Ellie? Adaeze Min? She had a daughter and kicked the bucket. The letter beginning the second name is a lowercase ‘L’, not an uppercase ‘i’ so Zhan’s daughter is basically named Mulan.
Zhan: Uh, ni hao, Mulan. *I’m your father.*
Mulan: *You mean that jerk who dumped my mom for a legacy foundress?*
(Note: Stuff said in Chinese will have little asterisks to avoid confusion between what is being said in Chinese and English.)
Zhan: *Hello, my name is Zhan Mendeleev and I understand that my daughter is living with you right now.*
Biyu: *Yes. You’re the man Mulan is always calling an ass.*
This is Mulan Mendeleev. I checked out her stats using Master Controller, and… this is where things get more sticky. She’s one day younger than Lithium. Meaning she must have been conceived while Zhan and Ellie were married.
Mulan: *Wow, you’re hot.*
Zhan: *I’m your father.*
Mulan: *Oh, Awkward.*
Zhan: See? My outfit makes me look young.
While Zhan meets his daughter and mourns the passing of his ex-girlfriend, Lithium is understandably pissed at her dad for having an affair with a woman on the other side of the world.
Lithium: You jerkface! How could you sleep with another woman?
Zhan: It’s not what you think. I’d been dating Adaeze before I started dating your mother, and Adaeze must have been pregnant when I left…
Lithium: Don’t lie to me. Anyone with eyes can see that Mulan is my age, or at the very least see that she was born after Hydrogen was.
Zhan: Okay, maybe Adaeze came to Sunset Valley and I had a moment of weakness. Once… a couple times…
Lithium: Whatever. I’m leaving.
Mulan: *Was that the floozy you left China with?*
Zhan: *No, she’s my daughter. I’m sorry if it feels like I abandoned you. Your mother never told me.*
Mulan: *It broke my mother’s heart when you left. I think that’s why she followed you to America.*
Zhan: *I feel terrible about hurting her like that. But that was the past. I think we need to put aside our anger and guilt to become a family again.*
While Zhan bonds with Mulan, Lithium is doing quests. I always make a profit on sim vacations, and an unexpected daughter isn’t going to change that.
Lithium: Do you have anything you need me to do? I need to get my mind off of some things.
Man: Came expecting a fun time with your dad and found a half-sister stemming from an affair instead? I get that a lot. Let’s see if I have a job for you…
Meanwhile, Zhan and Mulan are having a pillowfight as a daddy-daughter bonding exercise.
This picture would be so adorable if it wasn’t a reminder of Zhan’s infidelity. Infidelity without me knowing, which is even worse. Zhan doesn’t even have to ability to say that the sim-god made him cheat.
Cashier: Did you hear the news, miss? Adaeze Min has pased away!
Lithium: Just the person I didn’t want to hear about. Shut up and make me a burger.
The next morning, Lithium leaves base camp bright and early to go relic hunting because she knows that Zhan has invited her over.
Zhan: *Mulan, I want us to be a family. Will you come back to America with me? I understand if you want to stay with Biyu.*
Mulan: *Dad, I would love to come with you!*
So Mulan joins our household. (I wasn’t even sure if I could move her in as a teen.) She’s got a fun personality: brave like dad, flirty, a party animal, and mean-spirited.
Mulan: Ha ha! You are lame and French.
French guy: There is nothing wrong with being French!
Mulan: French is fail!
Speaking of fail…
Lithium, you couldn’t pee when you were in the shower? I know it’s gross, but it’s better than wetting yourself as soon as you get out and getting dirty all over again.
Lithium dreams about how Ellie is going to kill Zhan when they get home.
The next morning, Lithium has ice cream for breakfast.
Mulan: My English no good, but you eat ice cream because you cooking sucks, yes?
Lithium knows it’s not Mulan’s fault that she’s Zhan’s affair baby, so she tries to be friendly.
Lithium: Yeah, you’re right. My cooking majorly sucks. Maybe you could give me some pointers?
(Lithium’s cooking actually does suck. She always burns her food.)
Mulan: Stupid ape girl! I say bad thing about you, not good. You not be friends with me; you stole my father.
Lithium: Whatever. Dad likes me better.
Mulan: No, he likes me better.
Mulan’s right, he does.
Lithium: Yeah, well… You’re a loser and I bet this Adaeze woman isn’t your real mom anyway. She found you in the garbage can where your real mom dumped you.
Lithium: I can’t wait to go back home.
Mulan: But I come to America too!
So there you have it. Will Lithium and Mulan be able to put aside their differences? And what is Ellie going to say when Zhan brings Mulan home? She looks just like him, so he can’t deny that she’s his daughter.
Stay tuned for the next drama-filled installment of the Mendeleev legacy!